Lean In

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She sits on a thin, dirty mattress in her room, if you can even call it that. It’s more like a dark, damp, hopeless cell. The ragged blanket wrapped around her does little to protect her from the chill. She no longer notices the overwhelming stench of unwashed bodies permeating the space. The door is locked from the outside, holding her prisoner to the nightmare she is currently living. Walled in. There is no escape from this room, from her thoughts, from the men who come every night for hours upon hours. She stares into the distance, trying to numb her emotions, to block it all out. But despite her best efforts to build an impenetrable wall around her heart, tears fill her dark brown eyes. She whispers “Please, God. Rescue me,” as she hears the lock click open. She wipes her eyes, puts on a bright smile. It’s time to work. 

January is National Human Trafficking Awareness Month. Human trafficking happens all over the world, and during the past 18 months I had the privilege of working to combat trafficking with International Justice Mission in South Asia. While working there I came across this picture of a locked door and envisioned the story above happening behind it. It brought me to my knees as I cried for the girls locked behind doors all over the world. 

Even while working for an organization fighting injustice, it was easy at times to forget the real purpose -- getting caught up in the details of the day. Pictures like this and interacting with survivors always brought me back to the reality of my work. I knew the stats and percentages, but when I sat next to survivors of trafficking, I realized those “numbers” have faces, stories and dreams. 

It could be overwhelming at times. I vacillated between trying to ignore the feelings brought up and paralysis at the vastness of the problem. Founder of IJM Gary Haugen addresses this in Good News About Injustice: A Witness of Courage in a Hurting World.  

“In the end, the battle against oppression stands or falls on the battlefield of hope…Therefore they (oppressors) rely on, utterly depend on, the inaction of despair (p.81).” 

There is a danger in ignoring the issues of injustice, but also in being flooded with its reality. There is a balance that must be reached. 

Over time I have learned that it’s important to take time to lean into the hard feelings of anger, sadness, hurt, brokenness. To sit in the dark heaviness. It’s easier to brush those feelings off, to ignore them, move on, be tough. But Jesus calls us to hurt with those who are hurting. Jesus often felt the heaviness of the reality of life around him.  He would spend time with the Father, gathering the strength he needed to then go and minister to others. And I try to follow Jesus’ example. 

In South Asia, regaining perspective and strength often looked like going up to the terrace at work, listening to worship music, journaling, reading my Bible and pouring my heart out to God. Often praying Amos 5:24 -- Let justice roll down like waters and righteousness like an ever-flowing stream. Much like David did in the Psalms, after I “got it all out” I tried to then find comfort reading verses about God’s heart for justice. I would turn my thoughts to praise and thanksgiving. I reminded myself that yes, behind those locked doors there were many waiting for rescue, but a locked door could also represent a shuttered brothel locked and closed forever, never to be used to demean anyone ever again thanks to IJM’s work.

Afterwards I was often still sobered by the reality of life, but it was manageable. Having worked through my feelings, I was no longer drowning in despair and could move towards action. I could focus on the work that needed to be done. I could better see the glimpses of light amidst the dark. There is hope. So many are fighting for justice, for an end to slavery, for every person to be treated with respect and dignity. The work is hard and taxing, but change is happening! I saw it every day in the work being done in South Asia.

Constantly dwelling on the darkness of this world is not healthy. But sometimes, reality cannot be sugarcoated. Sometimes, inconvenient truths enter into the careful boundaries we put around our hearts and minds. And when they do we have a choice -- lean in and hurt with those who are hurting or keep up our boundaries and people at arm’s length. 

There are so many injustices happening in our world today. Pray about these issues, but also act. Choose a cause you believe in. Then start small. Educate yourself, share your knowledge, advocate, demand change. 

Choose to lean in.

OUR BLOGGER: Danielle (Dani) Rupp grew up in small town in Ohio and is true Buckeye fan, though she tries not to be obnoxious about it. In 2011 she came to PA to earn her Master of Social Work degree. Dani just returned from South Asia, where she volunteered with International Justice Mission, learned to tolerate spicy food and cross the roads without being hit.


THE 2020 CHALLENGE

Ever find yourself stuck in a spiritual rut, wishing for something a little different? Or maybe you just want someone to talk to who believes the way you do. Maybe you’re new to following Christ and want to find support. Or maybe you just want to hang out with women you have a lot in common with to enjoy fellowship or meet new people.

If you’ve felt any of these things, it may be time for you to join a small group. God doesn’t want us to do life alone. He wants us to take care of our spiritual selves, to fellowship with other believers, to have accountability and to share the good news of Jesus. You won’t be disappointed. Groups meet most days of the week during the school year and are available both on campus and off.

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