Christmas Disappointments: We’re Not Alone

I felt like I was wandering through an overly ornate antique shop or a flamboyant lighting store with one too many chandeliers. So much gold and red. Too many fancy trinkets hanging from the ceiling. Gold incense burners everywhere and elaborate golden crosses on the walls. Lots of candles burning. This place was overly adorned. More is not always better. For my taste, this was just over the top -- it was just too much. What a disappointment! Here I was, standing in Bethlehem, the birthplace of Jesus, at the Church of the Nativity and I was filled with disappointment. I was thinking, “This place is a bust!” Now I wonder, “Was it really too much, or was it just such a stark contrast to what I had expected?” 

Our tour group wound through the crowds and the building, ending up seated in a quaint chapel in the basement. It was very modest, almost like a cave -- the complete opposite of what we had just seen upstairs. The walls were arched toward the ceiling. The chairs were rustic and simple. In my memory, at the front, there was a simple altar and cross. Everyone was quiet as we waited for our tour guide, and then someone began to sing, “Away in a Manger.” 

Away in a manger

No crib for His bed
The little Lord Jesus
Lay down His sweet head

The stars in the sky
Look down where He lay
The little Lord Jesus
Asleep on the hay

Soon everyone joined in; the sound of the voices echoing in that small room was incredibly beautiful. I imagined the sound of a heavenly choir, then I could visualize what this sight was like on that first Christmas night. As we sang, tears rolled down my face. This was one of those moments that I would never forget. Jesus felt so near. In the person of Jesus Christ, God had left the splendor of heaven to come to the squalor of earth to live and walk among us. Sitting in the quiet of that little chapel, I was overwhelmed with God’s love for me. In that moment, I felt the love of a powerful God who was willing to make himself a helpless babe on my behalf. He came down from heaven out of love for us.

Like my visit to the birthplace of Jesus, I think Christmas is often connected with disappointment. I am sure there were even feelings of disappointment associated with that first Christmas.

I was reading in Matthew 2 about the Magi (wise men) who followed the star to Jesus. It is speculated that these men may have traveled from Babylon -- as far as 800 miles to find the king to whom the star was leading them. “We may well think what a disappointment it was to them, when they found a cottage was his palace, and his own poor mother the only attendant.” (Matthew Henry Commentary) Can you imagine their disappointment when they found the king they were seeking in this lowly state? Like my trip to the birthplace of Jesus, they must have felt such a letdown. I am certain this was not what they were expecting. And yet, how did they respond? 

Matthew 2:11 says, “On coming to the house, they saw the child with his mother Mary, and they bowed down and worshiped him. Then they opened their treasures and presented him with gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh.”

The wise men fell down and worshiped him. They knew that their leading to this place was supernatural -- God ordained.  Worship was the only proper response to the Lord. It is all they could do! It is all we can do!

Christmas is only a disappointment when we focus on the wrong things. I recall Christmas disappointments as a child when I didn’t get what I wanted. I recall disappointments as a mom when my kids weren’t excited about a new toy that we’d bought or when that new toy broke too quickly. There were disappointments in traditions that had gone awry. There were Christmases missing loved ones who had passed away or who couldn’t be there. 

And then there’s 2020! For many, it has been a year of disappointments: job loss, financial insecurity, loneliness, and celebrations cancelled. I am sure, there will be many dissatisfactions and frustrations associated with this Christmas, and in fact with most of this current year. The problem is that we often feel disappointed when things don’t go the way we want or the way we think they should. Because he was human, Jesus experienced sadness and disappointment too. He was fully man and at the same time, fully God. Because he was fully man, he can empathize with us and because he is God, we can trust that he is in control and that he has a plan (even now). Regardless of what is going on around us, we must remember that Jesus loved us enough to come to earth on a mission to save us. He loves us and he walks with us through all our disappointments. He sees you. He has not forgotten you. He is Immanuel -- God with us! 

These are the words that I sang in that humble chapel at the birthplace of our Lord. Note this stanza from the song “Away in the Manger.”  This is the best way to cope with disappointment. We are not alone. 

Be near me, Lord Jesus
I ask Thee to stay
Close by me forever
And love me, I pray.


MERRY CHRISTMAS from the Willowdale Women blogger team -- Bonnie, Susan, Mary Beth, Danielle, Lisa, Melanie, Krstin, Sarah, Katie, Elisabeth, Nancy and Giftie. As we celebrate the birth of our Savior in the upcoming days, we will not publish a blog on December, 31. Looking forward to 2021 and all the hope that it can bring! 

ABOUT OUR BLOGGER 

Bonnie Kotler loves to laugh and considers laughter as the best medicine. (Psalm 126:2) She is a licensed professional counselor at The Peacemaker Center and has her own private practice, True North Counseling. Bonnie and her husband, Mitch, have two daughters, three sons, five grandchildren, a 125-pound mastiff and three grand-puppies.

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CHRISTMAS 2020 at Willowdale Chapel

We hope you’ll join us for our online service Christmas Service and outdoor caroling and devotions on December 23 and 24, as we celebrate the birth of our Savior! For more details, click here.