ENCOURAGE - EQUIP - EMPOWER
IT STARTS HERE.
Over the last few months, I have learned (like many other teachers) that this “back to normal” school year is not actually “back to normal” at all. Somehow, with decreased health, safety precautions and the availability of a vaccine, this year seems even harder than last. A month or so ago I was in the middle of struggling with the school year, my mental health, and my general work life balance…
Do you ever feel like you’re running on fumes…or perhaps completely empty?
I imagine we have all experienced seasons where the reserves are running dry and we have nothing left in the tank.
Just over a year ago, I was in one of these seasons. A period of feeling like I was driving in circles, stuck in a perpetual NASCAR race wondering, “what’s the purpose...what’s my purpose?” I was discontent and burning out fast. That’s when my crew chief (Heavenly Father) called for a pit stop. Did I make it into the pit in time? Not quite... God had a literal pit stop in mind.
Growing up I always knew that Santa Claus was not real. (Sorry. Probably should have prefaced with a “spoiler alert” before dropping that truth.) But I liked to pretend and had a great imagination, so I would put out my play food by our fireplace with a little note embracing the magic of the season.
She was skipping along, smiling, and searching for the moon. Before I could remind her to watch her step, her feet lost their place and the sidewalk reached up and ripped the skin from her knees. She howled. Using the sleeve of my hoodie, I wiped the blood from the legs of my tender-hearted three-year-old and held her tight.
Like many of you, I collected random paraphernalia during my elementary years. Child development experts tell us that this ‘gathering and sorting’ stage is a healthy indicator of our active imaginations and natural bent toward classifying objects. My two oldest are currently in this phase and the organizer in me wants to chuck all of their [perceived] rubbish out the window.
When I dream about becoming the woman God has created me to be, it’s often associated with a long list of items that I have to do. How I can muster enough strength to stop worrying, focus on the positive, stop spending excess money, be more patient. I make these mental lists in my mind and when I don’t achieve them, I get upset with myself, causing a cycle of guilt. I want to live out this dream to be the best wife, mom, daughter, sister, co-worker, but it is honestly futile if I am doing it on my own strength.
Have you ever been stuck on a runway waiting for take-off? The minutes tick by slowly as you worry about not making your connecting flight or not beginning the vacation for which you are paying. You get impatient and think about how you can’t really “begin” your trip until you get to your destination.
My toddler learned a Vacation Bible School song that we’ve all been singing frequently over the past couple of weeks from the Roar! VBS program called I’m Trusting You.
I grew up in the heart of the Catskill Park in upstate New York. I swam in the Esopus Creek and hiked up Wittenberg Mountain. Whenever I walked the two miles along Route 28 from my house to Kirk’s Market in Phoenicia, I always ran into a neighbor I knew. The natural beauty of the Catskill Mountains and the friendly community made it a wonderful place to be a kid. I can’t possibly tell you what a childhood in that park means to me.
I also grew up with schizophrenia in my family…
I keep hearing people say “new year, new you!” The problem is, I don’t feel new. The year is barely a week old and I feel overwhelmed and overburdened. I feel like I can’t do even one more thing, that the tasks ahead of me are too many. Work. Home. Friends. Family. Laundry. Dinner. Cleaning. I feel pulled in so many directions that I can’t possibly do it all, like I am not enough. I feel like the needs of those around me are too great. I just can’t do it.
Lately I’ve been asking God for a miracle. Nothing big, nothing particularly life-changing, but one I’m yearning for nonetheless. It’s one of those things that would be against all odds. I’m boldly asking, but then just as soon as I ask, I tend to dismiss the possibility that He will actually do this thing...
I was reading in 1 John earlier and got pricked by, “whoever says he abides in him ought to walk in the same way in which he walked” (1 John 2:6). This verse has many lessons to glean about living a life like His, but what got me was a literal question. Do I walk “in the same way in which he walked?”
